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Open Relationship
 
jerryslayer  posted on Oct 24, 2011 1:35:10 AM - Report post

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in my opinion, you have to be able to trust someone for a relationship to work, and in open relationships your sense of trust gets thrown out the window (does for me anyhow) and in which case cant work, if you love each other then there should be no issue in making your relationship exclusive and making that commitment to eachother
 
king-of-games  posted on Oct 24, 2011 8:11:58 AM - Report post

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I'm not looking for advice by the way, just want to get your opinion on the concept of a open relationship in general.

I've already made up my mind and just want address acouple of things.

1. She was the one who suggested it but I was thinking about it long before she said anything, I just thought it would look bad if I said it first, we are VERY VERY similar people in the way we view life(almost identical). Plus Our agreement is only temporearly while we sort our lifes out since we are at very different parts of our lifes right now, but want to be together so badly on that deeper level. Its hard to explain.


My personal opinion is that regaurdless of how unaceptable it may be viewed by society, and although in most case they are bound to end up a distaster there will be times when it can and will work, I truely hope this is one of those times. I'm not the type to get insucure over that crap, but I told myself I will not sleep with anyone else unless she does it first.

 
jerryslayer  posted on Oct 24, 2011 9:24:46 AM - Report post

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quote:
originally posted by king-of-games

I'm not looking for advice by the way, just want to get your opinion on the concept of a open relationship in general.

I've already made up my mind and just want address acouple of things.

1. She was the one who suggested it but I was thinking about it long before she said anything, I just thought it would look bad if I said it first, we are VERY VERY similar people in the way we view life(almost identical). Plus Our agreement is only temporearly while we sort our lifes out since we are at very different parts of our lifes right now, but want to be together so badly on that deeper level. Its hard to explain.


My personal opinion is that regaurdless of how unaceptable it may be viewed by society, and although in most case they are bound to end up a distaster there will be times when it can and will work, I truely hope this is one of those times. I'm not the type to get insucure over that crap, but I told myself I will not sleep with anyone else unless she does it first.

good luck to you 2

 
drpepperfanatic  posted on Oct 24, 2011 9:59:57 PM - Report post

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I don't think I could ever be in an open relationship. Personally, I think that it should either be a relationship with just one person or you should be single and be able to sleep with whomever you choose. It would screw with my emotional stability too much.

The concept of an open relationship just seems to strange to me. I could never do it, but I also don't think it is right to force my beliefs about relationships on anyone else because everyone is different.

 
Diablo1exp  posted on Oct 25, 2011 2:38:10 AM - Report post

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quote:
originally posted by Neo7

By nature it does not work very well since humans do feel jealousy, vengeance, and other negative emotions when they are not the ones getting attention. Does not mean it is not impossible to work with though. The key concept is being able to give and receive love equally from everyone and if everyone involved can accept that, then more power to them.

Should be noted that for each additional person added to the relationship weave, the more complex and harder it will be to work with an open relationship.

Though from that, the problem is stemming from crossing a line with customer relationships. Traditionally getting into a relationship with someone you work with is not good since it has so much potential to blow up in your face and damage your career as well as your emotions. It's easy to have a client/trainer relationship and it's easy to have a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, but it is not easy to have both at the same time.

[Edited by Neo7, 10/23/2011 11:28:23 AM]

I agree with Neo7, this will not work.

 
Unbreakable  posted on Oct 25, 2011 9:34:52 AM - Report post

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I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. I know that personally, I couldn't do an open relationship. I think that relationships are based off of commitment, and I don't feel like I would be emotionally stable if I ever saw my girlfriend with another guy. If you think you can deal with an open relationship, than all the power to you; go right ahead. I know for sure that i couldn't do it, though.
 
xxjjrockerxx  posted on Oct 26, 2011 4:32:50 AM - Report post

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I think Neo summed it up pretty well. Humans are capable of feeling jealousy, and the green-eyed beast has never done anyone any good.

In order to maintain a successful open relationship (although could you call it 'successful'?) you need an incredible amount of trust from both parties. That amount of trust isn't easy to find, especially if you haven't known eachother very long, but if you feel like you have that, then by all means give it a go.

To me, the very meaning of a relationship is being faithful and loyal to eachother to the exclusion of all others. Therefore, I don't think an open relationship can really be called a 'relationship'. I know that's quite a strong opinion, but that's how I feel. I guess at heart I'm just an old romantic, and I still believe in all the 'one and only' stuff. I'd never be able to do it, but if you think you're capable of managing it, I wish you all the best of luck.

 
QueenNic  posted on Oct 30, 2011 4:15:43 PM - Report post

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Well, I've been poly-amorous before, which is almost the same thing. I loved both of them very much, but broke it off with one for the sake of what I considered my main relationship. There were insecurity issues, and my girlfriend didn't care much anyway since I found out a month after the break-up that she'd been cheating

There's nothing morally wrong with open relationships. It's not cheating if it's honest and the other person is fine with it.

Oh yeah, and I'd like to state for the record: An open relationship doesn't mean you don't love the person you're with. That's complete crap. I know other couples in open relationships who love their spouse/fiance/partner very much. These relationships work because there's trust, some of them even encourage their partner to find someone they like.

Not to mention it's incredibly rude to judge a relationship you're not a part of. It's as bad as saying homosexuals don't really love each other.

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