you run away from dead bodies.
you “stab” your wife, when she gets to close in the bed when you are asleep.
you yell, “Let’s do this” before anything you do.
you wonder who’s helicopter that is.
no matter where you are, you are extra cautious when you approach corners.
you crouch because it’s safer than standing.
when you search Ebay for a UAV jammer.
the leader boards say Total hours spent:99days:23hrs:52min.
when the only way you are turned on is if your girlfriend wears a ghillie suit.
when you wake up and you are still playing.
you knock something over, it sounds like a grenade, and you sprint out of the way.
there’s a red dot sight burnt into your lcd screen.
before you enter a room, you toss your keys in first.
the second you wake in the morning, you say, “Lets do this”.
in stead of trying to walk forward you press down with the middle finger of your left hand.
when u call a soldier on CNN a Noob for having the M203 on his M16.
you see a news chopper and run for cover.
you see a spider scurry across the room, step on it, and yell “plus ten!”.
you watch the GPS in your car for red dots.
when you’ve reached rank 55 and still end up last every game.
It’s all you ever play.
you yell “Cover me, I’m Reloading!” when you put more paper in the copying machine at work.
your dog joyfully jumps on to you and you break its neck.
someone bumps into you and you immediately want to hit the ‘melee’ key
your last name is Delta and you name your son Charlie Oscar.
instead of locking your car, u plant claymores or c4.
when you get a decimal overflow error on the duration played display.
You don’t die in a match of headquarters on shipment with 20+ players.
you wait for the “press space to jump over” icon when you want to get over a hurdle.
your done with a magazine and yell “Changing MAG”.
you can hear the gun fire and tell what weapon it is.
when dying you feel like really dying.
you wonder how many dead people are sharing your PoV.
you sit at home ALL day and don’t do anything but play CoD4, seems logical to me.
you fear the “clik click” sound everytime you enter a room.
when your online name has to be changed to “I don’t want to be in your damn clan”.
you hold your breath to steady you pencil while writing.
you are always looking up to your left to check to see if your radar is online yet.
when you are playin paintball and get three hits and turn to your team and ask if you should call in a uav.
when you ask your mom if SHE can cook a grenade.
girlfriend says it’s me or Soap McTavish. Toughest decision of my life. see you guys at District.
when you think the UPS guy is planting C4 on your doorstep.
when you start naming the different guns in war movies.
when a camera flashes and you drop to the floor.
your playing soccer and you sprint to the nearest corner flag, lay down and shout “Securing Charlie!”
when you see a group of people and think its a good place for a martyrdom.
in toilet cubicles you throw paper grenades at your mates and shout ‘FRAG OUTT!!’
you yell ‘COVER ME IM RELOADING’ while filling up the photocopier with paper in the office.
you walk around cautious thinking theres a sniper watching you.
you start using windows as entries and exit points around your house.
when you are in a room by yourself and inside your head you hear “get it done soldier, you are all that is left!”
when you fail a test and go “damn…we just got our asses kicked”.
you took the time to read all of these.
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I don't play much CoD, but this was by far the funniest.