You're not a jerk as much as I can only repeat it from my point of view: Trainer is working as intended - every option.
You know... I had something like you describe happen to me with a trainer for a different game I downloaded from here some time ago. Before then, I was running at 1920X1200 and things were OK with CH previous trainers, but now I'm running 3840X2160 and I'm thinking that might be the problem (I was using a couple of AMD 480s in crossfire at the time). They did change the interface a while back and I thought maybe they just forgot to allow for the higher resolutions that are starting to be popular, but they're good at everything else so it didn't really seem like that was the answer. I wonder if it might be possible to just have the trainer page auto center and then let the user move it to where they want it. Like you, I could not drag it anywhere and it only showed a small amount of itself in the lower right corner. It didn't matter much to me because I print out the "readme" page and use that instead of trying to read the digital page in-game while I am getting used to the commands involved. I'll see what happens after I try this download with my new computer and if the same thing happens with the 1080 TI I'll report back.