I was a lonely soul but thats the old me posted 7/18/2014 12:01:01 PM
That title is a lie. I'm still very much a lonely soul. And I'm still not over her. I thought moving to boston and sleeping with another girl would help me, but it didn't. There's something missing from my life that I'm trying to fix by using these girls to make me feel better about myself. To make me feel like I actually ****ing matter. I'm currently romantically talking to 4 girls online, and one In real life. None of this is helping. I just want to finally ****ing get over her. I accidentally clicked on her instagram the other day, and I immediately started drinking a bottle of new amsterdam. I have no impulse control, and I'm right back where I started.
I'm at a huge house party, with a ton of attractive white girls (my own personal version of heaven), but I can't talk to any of them because I'm not nearly drunk or high enough. **** low self-esteem, and **** social anxiety
Missed calls and emails posted 6/22/2014 11:44:08 AM
Being here and away from home has worked in some ways. I should really probably slow down. Seen some things, done some things. Still have no idea what I want out of life. Still regretting every decision. Feel like I don't even know who I am anymore. Met a girl online, been talking to her. I don't know. It feels aimless.