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buko988
bigmouth_130@hotmail.com

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Concerning Zombies.
posted 8/26/2008 3:55:26 PM

I would like to clear a few things up about our Undead counter-parts.
1. Zombies are not a race.

2. Zombies in science just don't work. Zombies are said to have a craving for human flesh and/or brains. So, in theory, zombies should be trying to eat each other's flesh and/or brains. As even though they are undead, they still possess human muscle and tissue under their skin (Flesh) and a human brain.

So when you see some cheap-quality zombie movie (Resident Evil series) where the tall, good looking skanky tramp runs from a billion zombies, she wouldn't have to worry that much. The Zombie's should be so busy eating each other the brave skanky tramp shouldn't have to worry, and she can sneak right past them and go back to work in a brothel or something.

3. Zombies in biology, don't work. Bacteria in most areas has been proven that it cannot take control of a sentient being. People have on this matter tried to explain to me that the Zombie Virus is a parasite, like in Dead Rising it's those maggot/worms that glow green in the dark, being stung by a queen or being bitten by a Zombie. In some cases the Zombie parasite enters the body through gas. So, how can it be a parasite if no creature really enters the body. The maggot's of Willamette in Dead Rising were original, never before used as something to turn someone into a Zombie, and since maggots eat flesh themselves they would be useless to infect people, as they would turn them into zombies then simply eat them from the inside, thus ruling them out. A sting from a Bee (like again, displayed in Dead Rising) can inflict serious pain, but as other tests have proven most instects other than fleas simply die from being infected with deadly bacteria and viruses, thus ruling them out also.

4. The idea of a Zombie is to make the dead rise, possibly the most stupid idea I've ever heard in my life. What do people hope to accomplish from bringing back the dead? Even if they made it so the living could not become zombie's themselves, who'd want shambling corpses in our houses, in our streets, cities, towns and countries. Besides, imagine the smell of your house if there was a zombie living there. It'd take more than Oust to rid your home of the stench of the rotting dead.

5. A Zombie is a walking corpse. Getting a dead body then bringing it back to life using bacteria itself is impossible, nevermind bringing is back to life then sending it out to turn others into zombies.

6. Probably the best of the points I have made in this entry, Zombie's aren't real, don't exist, and never will. It's impossible to bring back the dead, it's probably even harder to combat rigor mortis in a dead body.A Zombie, since it is dead, and all other undead creatures (Vampires and all that crap) should suffer from Rigor Mortis, stiffening their bones to a point where they can barely move.

7. A Zombie, since it is dead, and all other undead creatures (Vampires and all that crap) should suffer from Rigor Mortis, stiffening their bones and muscles to a point where they can barely move. In some Zombie movies, the Zombies live forever until they are killed (again). Technically, since they are rotting corpses, they should turn into dust like any other dead body eventually does. Meaning instead of sending in Special Forces or the army or whatever else, you could just wait, maybe a year or two, and the Zombies, and the virus, will die out.

So, I hope this clears a few things up about Zombies. I felt a need to write this as I am a man of logical thinking, and most people on the internet aren't (not the people of CheatHappens of course) so this entry should make whoever reads it put some thought into the theory of Zombies, and realise how they just don't work. Even the concept of them would never work.


So there you have it, my thoughts Concerning Zombies.
And I realised how stupid that sounds after I read it outloud.

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