[Edited by Whit3Ghost, 7/14/2010 9:35:32 AM]
Ok, here we go. It's a little old, but it's a lot like fine wine.
Q: What did Blackbeard say when he was asked what Anti-Virus program he uses?
A: "Avast ye land lubber!"
Okay, so you're on a beautiful white horse. There's a stampede of gazelles in front of you that won't get out of your way, a lion behind you, more horses to your right, and on your left, a drop-off. How do you get out of this dangerous situation?!
A: Get your drunken *** off the Merry-Go-Round!!
I admit, it's kind of corny. But it's true...
She says "If you catch me you can have me" so he chases her, and chases her, and chases her, and finally he gives up and goes home. Sure enough he lost ten pounds.
So he call's them back and takes the 20 dollar package this time, so the next day, the absolutely most beautiful woman he's ever seen in his life is standing at his door. She says "If you catch me you can have me." So he runs, and runs, and runs and when he finally gives up he goes back home and he lost 20 pounds.
At this point he was still not in the best shape, so he decided too see what the 50 dollar package is. A few days later a big burly guy in a thong knocks on the door. "If I catch you, you're mine."
[Edited by fault2k, 7/14/2010 1:32:44 PM]
[Edited by malyg, 7/19/2010 7:14:51 AM]